How My Old Sales Training Got Me Kate Bush Tickets

On Friday, I had a leisurely start to the day.  My partner, Julian, was servicing a long-haul and I’d planned to work from home and ease myself gently into the weekend.  I had a lie in until eight-thirty and then drank some coffee on the balcony deliberately leaving all my devices inside so I wouldn’t be tempted to start the working day too early.  I then decided I would have a nice hot shower before I started work.

Whilst under the shower, I began to get a nagging feeling I had forgotten something.  This happens sometimes and always turns out to be something trivial.  I put it down to the fact I had to pick up a handmade necklace for Julian’s Mothering Sunday gift and got back to soaping my pits.

I sat down at my desk at 9.45am suitably refreshed and ready for a day’s lazy work.  I opened my browser.

Fuck.

Kate Bush tickets had gone on sale at 9.30am and I had the responsibility of securing 2 for me and Kate’s biggest fan, Julian.  I had clean forgot.  I was 15 minutes late and news reports were already stating they had sold out.  My heart dropped.

I thought the news must be wrong - it usually is.  

I refused to believe all of the tickets had gone.  I quickly logged into Eventim and sure enough all of the dates were in red meaning Sold Out.  I flicked onto Facebook and Twitter to see who was boasting about procuring tickets in the vain hope I might be able to bribe somebody out of a pair.  No dice.  Only two people had managed to get tickets and I knew they loved Kate as much as Julian.  I was in trouble.

I went back to the ticket website and some of the dates were flashing green for a split second.  This meant the tickets were coming back on sale, didn’t it?  Was there still hope?  I clicked on dates as soon as they turned green but they would be back to red as soon as the next page clicked through.  I tried this many times and had to surmise this was simply a glitch on the site - all the tickets had sold.  Facebook and Twitter were now full of people bemoaning the injustice of losing out on a ticket like they had lost their house in the blitz.  Seems like it was all over.  Including maybe my relationship.  Damn.

I could imagine Julian’s disappointment and couldn’t take no for an answer.  I went back on the website and kept on top of the flashing green dates.  I clicked about 100 and every single one had sold by the time the next page loaded.  This was surely an exercise in futility but I refused to give up.  Then, on the 101st click, something magical happened.  I managed to secure 2 tickets.  Oh My God.  I had tickets!  The digital counter started ticking down telling me I had ten minutes to complete my purchase.  Plenty of time.  I took a deep breath as my insides danced with joy.  I clicked through to the payment page and the website crashed.  I froze with disbelief.

Now, this should have reduced me to the type of gibbering wreck who posts his dismay on Facebook I made a choice to be proactive.  I looked at it through optimistic eyes.  At least this meant there were some tickets left.  And I was going to get one.

Facebook and Twitter was now filling up with even more people crying about not securing tickets.  These are the pessimists.  The Big Fat Losers.  They had given up.  How could they expect to get anywhere in life with that kind of attitude?

It was now 10.45am.  According to the news, all of the tickets had sold out an hour ago.  Pfft.  I went back onto the ticket website and hovered over those dates like a hungry hawk.

The tickets were disappearing as soon as they were becoming available.  There were a lot of fervent Bush fans out there.  Due to the speed involved, I concluded people were mindlessly grabbing any ticket, therefore securing it for 10 minutes, and then checking the details.   People would realize the ticket they had secured was the wrong date or price for them.  These tickets would then resurface after the 10 minute countdown had expired and went back into the arena for everyone to fight over.

Any salesperson knows the main difference between successful and non-successful salespeople is more about pessimism than patter.  You can have the gift of the gab but if you get put off after a series of rejections, you’re never going to find success.  Likewise, a relatively inept salesperson can do fairly well if they apply tenacity and optimism to the job.  Keep going and keep positive.  

With all the pessimistic losers already giving up, I knew I could secure the deall.  I sat on the ticket website constantly refreshing for another 20 minutes trying to grab a sale.  Then it happened again, BINGO, I managed to get through and bag two tickets.  And this time it didn’t crash.  I got 2 tickets to Kate Bush and saved my relationship because I refused to give up.  It's that simple.

Never take no for an answer and you too, could get yourself some Bush.

Starbucks is Not Your Office.

This has happened to me more than once…

I have been sat in Starbucks enjoying my coffee and using the Wifi when suddenly I’ve become aware of the business meeting on the next table.

Now, I think this is fine if you’re having an informal catch up with a client or colleague but recently I was almost sat in on a job interview.  

There was a woman sat adjacent to me on a single table and a young man approached her inquiring if she was Helen.  She very formally stated she was, shook his hand and asked him to sit down.  She then located his CV and began to ask him a few questions.  In very close proximity to me.  I am sat on my own, I am not engaging with anyone, just surfing the net and recharging my caffeine levels.  Both of them have to be fully aware that I am privy to everything they are saying.  

There is no way Helen is going to get the best out of a prospective employee if she grills them in a public place.   The confidence one needs in a job interview situation can easily dissipate with a few strangers listening in.  It also speaks volumes about the company Helen works for - a popular travel agency.  If I applied for a job and was lucky enough to get called in for an interview - I would think twice if they asked me to come to Starbucks.  In fact, I wouldn’t go.

About a year ago, I was sat next to a disciplinary.  A young guy who worked in a local gym had been brought to Caffe Nero to get a ticking off about his poor performance.  His name was Darren and he had been watching DVDs on the computer when he should have been patrolling the weights room.  The fact I know this is because I could hear every single word as his boss had inexplicably decided to have this conversation with him on the table next to me.   Why did she think this was acceptable?  If she’s worked her way up to a managerial position, you might have thought she was bright enough to know she was broadcasting this poor guy’s deficiencies to the adjacent caffeine-addicts.

We are living in times of austerity.  I understand costs need to be kept at a minimum but outsourcing your meeting rooms to the nearest coffee chain is a terrible move.  How would you feel if a random member of the public came and sat next to you in your office and listened in on everything you were doing?  Would it make you feel uncomfortable?  Aware of how much information you were divulging?  This is exactly what happens in when you arrange meetings in Starbucks.  Next time it happens, I’m going to transcribe everything and post it on Twitter.  You have been warned.